Polishing turds and pigs in lipstick - The Paul Mort Podcast

Polishing turds and pigs in lipstick

August 28, 2015

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Uncle Mortys been snooping around ye olde’
Urban Dictionary’…

(*Don’t ask* ahaha)

“Polishing a turd: To fix, repair, repaint,
shine or do other things to something that
isn’t worthy – but you have to do it for one
reason or another. Because the basic fact is
no matter what you do to a turd – polish it,
paint it, give it bling – it’s still a turd,
and there is nothing you can do about that
underlying fact.”

Man there are a ton of different applications
for this saying right?

An asshole is an asshole.

A mush cookie is a mush cookie (no matter how
many lies he tells)

A pig is a pig, wether you put lipstick on it
or not.

How does this apply to business?

Allow me to ‘splaineth, your grace…

~You can market as hard as you like…

~Spend as much money as you want

~Send as many emails your heart can handle

~Put up as many facebook ads as they let you

~Plough as much money into that website as
you like

~buy as much fancy equipment as you like

~ hustle till the cows come home

~ drop as many ‘special offers’ as you want


You may wanna write this one down..hombre

or stick it in the ‘notes’ section of your
phone or something…




“We’re different here at Joe Bloggs Fitness”


Your probably aren’t

The very fact you’re saying that tells me you

Oh.. You ‘REALLY CARE’ about your clients

Yup, douchebag with the tupperware war chest
is saying that too


IT. stop it. stop it. stop it. <-- get it? Aaaaaanyhoo… So how do you BLOW UP your overall product? You BUILD A FUCKING TRIBE You make your sessions and program an INSANE

One that people CANT HELP but tell their
friends about

and honestly, bacbycakes

I have NOT SEEN A BETTER, more bad-ass
program than Martin Rooneys

“Training for Warriors”

Click this link to find out more:


Paul ‘turd burgler’ Mort

PS- Martins program CLOSES


For a full year

you just wanna hope your competition doesn’t
jump in there before you, broheim

that link again:


















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