Paul Mort: Summoned to court for taking a dump - The Paul Mort Podcast

Paul Mort: Summoned to court for taking a dump

January 28, 2017

back when I was a ‘wet behind the ears’ PT

I used to run this 6:15am group training session here in South Shields

Same routine before going every morning

Get up, drink a coffee, take a dump

But I remember one morning after a heavy weekend partying
(those days are LONG gone)

I hit the snooze button on the old iphone

My routine changed


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I got up, grabbed a coffee, drank it in the car on the way to the class

Bleary eyed, we started the warm up and mobilization part


The poop monster decided to wake up and ROAAARR

2 minutes later, I’m demoing a lateral lunge…

and touching cloth at the same time (nice image huh?)

So I’m in this big quandry

I’m teaching a session

I live 5 mins away

and I HAVE TO, like MUST take a dump

Now, luckily for me… there’s a public toilet just around the corner


NOPE. the fuckers locked.

at this point, I’m sweating, getting cramps in my stomach

and I have a mars bar growing from my but

What do I do?

Warning: HORRFYING image coming up—>

I drop my drawers, settle into a squat

I take a shit on the ground… right next to the public toilet

I mean, what else was I supposed to do? drop it in my undercrackers?

Don’t worry- it got scooped up, with a leaflet and put in the bin

FINALLY- went back to teaching the class

But just a few days later

In the post- I receive a SUMNMONS to go to court


SHIT… (pardon the pun)

apparently dropping your load in public is illegal

I got away with a fine and a warning

and am FOREVER reminded that hitting the snooze button


In your case, amigo?

Mindset X #2.0 is filling up FAST.

I only have 18 seats left AND the closing date is only


So if you want to come and learn how to bulletproof your mind

so you can RADICALLY upgrade your results


Go here:

Paul ‘turtles head’ Mort

PS- Got some un-solicited ‘advice’ yesterday..

So Watch out for my email response

in the meantime—>

I’ll see you in March, won’t I?

Don’t forget…

if you’re offended by

A- HONESTY (which in this industry is as rare as hens teeth)


B- Talk of poop (everyone does it, you know)

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Then please take your ass to the nearest ” Free Facebook Group”

and complain about me in there- like most other people who hate honesty

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