Dear Mrs Blunderbuss…. (Canon Fodder) - The Paul Mort Podcast

Dear Mrs Blunderbuss…. (Canon Fodder)

Discover How to Dominate Your Local Area and Crush Your Competition with My Famous Daily Emails

Give me your email address and I’ll also send you a free digital copy of my powerful £98 a month “MMIC newsletter”

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I fully understand when I sign up, I am subscribing Paul Mort where I will received DAILY emails and promotional messages from Paul Mort

“I was on the train today and overheard some

people talking and chuckling about some awful
sounding arrogant nut job called paul mort. I
googled your name to see for myself and by
gum were they right. I can’t make head nor
tails of your blogs and by the looks of the
comment sections no one else can either, no
great loss there though.


that there…

was a comment on my blog I received

I’m pretty excited about this one.

I LOVE canon fodder like this from jumped up little
knackers with nothing better to do.

and a lil lesson in making money vs making
your ego feel good.

So here goes, babycakes:

Dear Mrs Blunderbuss,

Thank you for taking the time out of your
clearly busy schedule to both google me and
then read my blog.(and of course, comment on
said blog)

I really do appreciate it.

I did try to google you too. (to make you
feel better about yourself) but alas, I was
unable to find a smidgeon of your existance,
or, if you prefer- jack shit.

You little rascal, you also didn’t realise
that your I.P address shows up on your blog
posts did you?

So at least I know you’re from Jarrow (bless

I remember when I was bitter and poor too,
Margaret… and had to take the ‘metro’ to

No wonder you sound so upset.

Congratulations on your observation of ‘awful
sounding, arrogant nut job’ though,

your fellow train travellers description was
very accurate.

nice to see your eavesdropping skills still
work too, despite your age (those hearing
aids are just great, aren’t they?)

But there’s one thing you’re WRONG on, my
dear old friend…

Comments on blogs DO NOT pay the bills.

You see, I used to write a ton of blog posts
over on

I did receive a lot of lovely comments, that
did indeed make me feel good…

But Unfortunately didn’t put bacon in my

and Margaret, I do like bacon.

(Particularly as it pays for nice things for my kids
and me)

See, if someone is commenting on my blog…

They aren’t clicking the payment link, or
inserting their credit card details.

Which makes me kinda sad, Madame Blunderbuss.

Maybe, “Margaret”

(although we all know that isn’t your name)

if you spent more time reading my emails.

(I’m not sure if you get them or not, saying
as you didn’t have the balls to put your
ACTUAL email address in the comment- Pussy)

Then you would indeed be a little less

If you spent less time eavesdropping and
trying to wind me up with your pathetic
little comments..

You might be able to buy yourself a nice
little car to tour around Jarrow in.

I thank you again for your comments,

Although I would prefer it if you signed up
On second thoughts…

maybe not.

You won’t be able to afford it:


Click here to get my famous daily emails

Couple of lessons for you here, amigo

1- When you start to ‘make a name’ for

Retards like this will try and pull you down.

Fuck em. Write emails about em. They’ll soon pipe down.

DO NOT engage them on social media.

2– Email kicks bloggings ass. HANDS DOWN.

Fuck comments, get money.

3– (BONUS) I just copy and paste my emails
into my blog.

Time saver and you still get the ‘seo’ hit
from the blog

Just a little something I teach in MMIC.

Paul ‘Think Margaret wants to bang me’ Mort

PS- Yer, this DID push the ‘overweight trainer’
email back a day.

Patience, hombre…


Click here to get my famous daily emails


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